Saturday, December 31, 2011
New years
Old post that i meant to publish...It's new years eve and I am reflecting back on the years events.... What an emotional year... Jan- time of our lives. Amazing family vacation. Finances were in order. Family was so blissful. We really couldn't be any happier ( we in this life anyways) Feb- joslyns 8th birthday. Family sealing for time and all eternity 2.26.11. ( best day of our lives) March- Rob baptized joslyn and speaks for her confirmation. March 28 2011 the absolute worse news anyone can ever hear. Cancer stage 4 in your lungs. April- rob starts chemo March- more chemo May- chemo some more June- doctors tell us he has only months left on this earth. July- travel to California, Mexico, Arizona, Texas looking for an alternative cure... An alternative ending. July 29th said goodbye ( for now) to my love, my life, my dreams. This year was the worst year a family ever faces. This year our hearts were broken into a million pieces. This year ended our hopes and dreams.
Sunday, December 25, 2011
Christmas eve
It's 1:30 am on Christmas. Once again I am unable to sleep. Its in the quiet hours of the night that my heart hurts the most. It just really is difficult to breath sometimes. I still play the "what if game" all the time. I dream that I would just wake from this nightmare. I was reflecting on last Christmas... Right before the holidays we were visiting with our good friends. We asked what their plans were for Christmas and they responded that they were headed to Utah for what might be the last christmas with their father ( he had been battling cancer for about six years). Little did I know it would be Robs last Christmas with us as well. That stupid cancer took away my husband and all of my dreams. It stole his life and mine. So I sit here crying wondering "what if". Remembering our last Christmas together. In the morning when the sun rises and day breaks, after my body is renewed and my tear ducts are all dried up I will celebrate the birth of our savior and a promise of eternal family. For now I will dream of him in his new Christmas eve Jammie's.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Saturday, May 21, 2011
recent events and not so recent
Last years Halloween costumes. Joslyn was Tangled (wig courtesy of mom) and savannah was a spider. (Oct. 2010)
Joslyn won the bike at the bike rodeo!! (Jan??)
Daddy and Joslyn at their 3rd daddy daughter dance. (Feb)Saturday, April 30, 2011
Unlucky lottery
So we received word on March 28th that Rob's cancer is back and being very aggresive. It has spread into his lungs and is considered a stage 4 since it is now in his blood stream. I never want to relive the day we were told this horrible news. At first I kept thinking of the past and if only we had... but I cannot look athe past anymore just keep positive about the future and enjoy the moment. Rob is young and strong and Heavenly Father has a plan for us. Every day we count our many blessings! Angel friends and family have lightened our burdon tremendously and we are so thankful for their support and love. I hope to blog a bit more so that I can keep a journal of this journey and keep friends/family up to date.
Rob started Chemo therapy at the Huntsman Cancer center in Salt Lake UTAH. His first round started April 6th (Wednesday) He ended that treatment on April 9th. W came home on Saturday. Sunday was ok but Monday throgh Wednesday were rough. He has no memory of those days. He was really dehidrated, sick and achy. On Friday he had a temperature and we were told to go to the emergency room. He was admitted to Centennial Hospital on Friday and released on Monday. His white blood cells were registeed at .3 and the norm is at least a 4. So he basically had no white blood cells to fight infection. He was put in isolation and given antibiotics for an infection n his throat. When he came home on Monday he felt very fatigued over the next few days. We did get out of the house and go to the temple to take family pictures with Lindsay and the next day he shaved his head because his hair started falling out. We also took pictures at Red Rock with Carly. We just started his second round of chemo on Wed. April 27th. This time the doctors have lowered his dosage by 20% and extended the length of treatment to 5 days. We are in Salt Lake now and we should be able to drive home on Monday. He started feeling bad last night but we are hopeful that this round will be better then the last. The doctors will start giving him antibiotics after we leave, they have arranged for iv fluids so he won't get dehidrated and they have gived him a vitamin to offset the effects of chemo so he homefully will have better days between treatments. We will betraveling to Salt Lake every 21 days and we will stay there for 5 days. The hospital is fabulous and the staff are so loving. I get to stay in the room with him on a pull out couch. They have a really nice restraunt here. And extra things to comfort us like a DVD player and Redbox. Our girls are staying in Vegas while we travel. We miss them a ton but they are in great hands.
I am reading and listening to CDs to find help outside of conventional therapy. Every day a new person is introduced into our lives that help guide us to a heathier way of life. Its no surprise that diet plays a huge role in this desease and I am constantly trying to learn new things about the effects of good foods that will help our fight. A very thoughtful couple in our ward loaned us CDs to the book Anti- Cancer. When doctors told him he only had a few months to live before bone cancer took his life he decided to combat it himself. It has been 9 years since the doctors told him that news and he looks so healthy! He shared some of the Anti Cancer book ideas with us and made us a veggie drink mix that included 9 cloves of garlic! I am learning so much each day. It has beena unique blessing and will change our entire families diet. As new studies come out my ideas might change about certain food in our diet but for now these are the things I am focusing on. No red meat, less chicken turkey ( I am headed towards no meat at all), Almond milk instead of regular milk ( or at least grass fed cows milk) more veggies and fruits. Green tea, water, no soda, no carboated drinks, less sugar and stevia substitute when possible. More indian food and Japanese food. I have also purchased a juicer and we try and juice veggies everyday. No processed foods, no fast food. The only real problem that I have in following this diet is chocolate. I need to find a happy meduim for my chocolate!
I know heavenly father has placed on this journey to bring our family closer together, to humble us, to adapt our diets, to count our blessings, enjoy life to the fullest, to draw closer to our friends and accept their help with humble hearts, and most importantly to draw closer to him and his son. I know they carry us closely and love us.
Rob started Chemo therapy at the Huntsman Cancer center in Salt Lake UTAH. His first round started April 6th (Wednesday) He ended that treatment on April 9th. W came home on Saturday. Sunday was ok but Monday throgh Wednesday were rough. He has no memory of those days. He was really dehidrated, sick and achy. On Friday he had a temperature and we were told to go to the emergency room. He was admitted to Centennial Hospital on Friday and released on Monday. His white blood cells were registeed at .3 and the norm is at least a 4. So he basically had no white blood cells to fight infection. He was put in isolation and given antibiotics for an infection n his throat. When he came home on Monday he felt very fatigued over the next few days. We did get out of the house and go to the temple to take family pictures with Lindsay and the next day he shaved his head because his hair started falling out. We also took pictures at Red Rock with Carly. We just started his second round of chemo on Wed. April 27th. This time the doctors have lowered his dosage by 20% and extended the length of treatment to 5 days. We are in Salt Lake now and we should be able to drive home on Monday. He started feeling bad last night but we are hopeful that this round will be better then the last. The doctors will start giving him antibiotics after we leave, they have arranged for iv fluids so he won't get dehidrated and they have gived him a vitamin to offset the effects of chemo so he homefully will have better days between treatments. We will betraveling to Salt Lake every 21 days and we will stay there for 5 days. The hospital is fabulous and the staff are so loving. I get to stay in the room with him on a pull out couch. They have a really nice restraunt here. And extra things to comfort us like a DVD player and Redbox. Our girls are staying in Vegas while we travel. We miss them a ton but they are in great hands.
I am reading and listening to CDs to find help outside of conventional therapy. Every day a new person is introduced into our lives that help guide us to a heathier way of life. Its no surprise that diet plays a huge role in this desease and I am constantly trying to learn new things about the effects of good foods that will help our fight. A very thoughtful couple in our ward loaned us CDs to the book Anti- Cancer. When doctors told him he only had a few months to live before bone cancer took his life he decided to combat it himself. It has been 9 years since the doctors told him that news and he looks so healthy! He shared some of the Anti Cancer book ideas with us and made us a veggie drink mix that included 9 cloves of garlic! I am learning so much each day. It has beena unique blessing and will change our entire families diet. As new studies come out my ideas might change about certain food in our diet but for now these are the things I am focusing on. No red meat, less chicken turkey ( I am headed towards no meat at all), Almond milk instead of regular milk ( or at least grass fed cows milk) more veggies and fruits. Green tea, water, no soda, no carboated drinks, less sugar and stevia substitute when possible. More indian food and Japanese food. I have also purchased a juicer and we try and juice veggies everyday. No processed foods, no fast food. The only real problem that I have in following this diet is chocolate. I need to find a happy meduim for my chocolate!
I know heavenly father has placed on this journey to bring our family closer together, to humble us, to adapt our diets, to count our blessings, enjoy life to the fullest, to draw closer to our friends and accept their help with humble hearts, and most importantly to draw closer to him and his son. I know they carry us closely and love us.
Friday, April 1, 2011
Prayer
Please pray for my family. Rob is fighting cancer that has spread. He is strong and will beat this but I know that prayer will help him. Please add our family to your prayers. thank you
Friday, January 21, 2011
Christmas 2010
The girls and their babies and matching PJ's that Santa gave them
I love holidays and the traditions that we follow. I love decorating and bringing the spirit to our home. Some of my favorite highlights from Christmas are>>>>
1) Alyssa staying with us through Christmas day. Love her! The girls decorated christmas cookies with Papa.
2) Caroling with the Young Women in our ward. Their spirits are genuine and beautiful.
3) Lance and Peggy helping to decorate our home. Love them!We are so blessed with their friendship!
4) Christmas shopping with Lindsay. She cracks me up! I love her to pieces!
5) Breakfast with Kayla. Love that crazy teenager!
6) Christmas Eve Lunch with my side of the family at Bootlegger. We had about 20 people! and it was really nice to see Dustin and Melanie
7) Christmas Eve with Whetten's. Santa came and gave everyone including kids Christmas PJ's. We have a yummy dinner and played really fun games. Including the reindeer game, and a gift passing game. We also read the Christmas story scriptures. and we got to meet Carly's new fiance!
8) Touring the neighborhood lights and rewarding the best decorations home with a present and note.
9) Christmas ward party and Papa singing O Holy Night.
10) Progressive dinner with Young women. It was also my birthday so my wonderful husband arranged for everyone to sing happybirthday and eat chocolate cake. I was so surprised!
Joslyn's new shoes Girls got a trampoline
Stairwell tree Winnie the pooh tree and wreath
The "SCULPTURE"
We are so blessed!! Our friends, The Peterson family invited us on a private jet for a 4 day vacation to Laguna Beach. We left on Friday at 11AM and by 11:40 AM our feet hit the sand!! We spent 3 nights overlooking the ocean! It was 82 Degrees outside! The kids had a blast in the sand! Jesse and Rob had some fun as well:) They built a sand sculpture:) (A pregnant woman giving birth. It was hilarious!! People walking on the beach would stop and take pictures. One couple stayed for a good 5 minutes saying they had never seen such a beautiful sculpture and someone in the group must be an OBGYN. Another group asked if we did this often (like we were local artists making a artistic statement) It was so funny. We were all rolling with laughter from the reactions of the mens "Sand Sculpture"
At sunset we saw a family of dolphins swimming right by us. It was such a fun and relaxing vacation. We can't wait to go again:)
At sunset we saw a family of dolphins swimming right by us. It was such a fun and relaxing vacation. We can't wait to go again:)
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